Frog Legs

Bruh mi nah go lie—Bomos Island? Bloodclaat dead place, fam. Man pull up on Olympus tinkin seh it aguh be some fire vibes, and mi land pon dis dry rass island weh feel like di devs just fling it in fi mek map look big. Mi deh pon patrol, mi look lef, mi look right—nuttin deh deh but rock, dirt, an’ depression. Mi a tell yuh, mi foot dem hurt from runnin’ cross all dat empty bush fi one lil’ dusty checkpoint weh cya even spawn proper AI. Whole island feel like it got abandoned halfway tru development, like dem devs just said “fuck it” and buss out to go code somewhere else. Mi radio in seh, “Command, where di ops?” Dem seh, “Check Bomos.” Mi seh, “Check mi foot, cause nuttin nah gwan pon Bomos but breeze an’ bad texture load-in.” And mi nah even start 'bout di loot, fam. Man nah even find one basic kit. Not even a rusty makarov. Jus’ shame an’ sandflies. Mi see one man wander in there like he lost from Kavala, he seh “Where di rebels at?” Mi seh, “Bredda, di only ting rebelling here is mi patience.” Whole island a scam. If mi wanted to explore nuttin, mi woulda go chill in di debug zone wit Peter Long an’ Rabid and dem, hotdog in hand an’ belly full a shame. Mi done, mi cya tek it no more. Bomos a straight 0/10. Gimme back mi gas money and teleport mi to Therisa, cause mi mental state cyan handle one more minute inna dat void.

What he sai

Man… I ain’t even gon’ lie, I’m still heated over that dusty-ass, weak-ass, embarrassing-ass wooden MK-1 I bought. I spent REAL money on that shit, nga. Thought I was coppin’ a lil vintage heat — nah, that bitch shoot like it’s powered by sadness and splinters. One shot every 8 business days, got recoil like it’s mad at me personally. I pull the trigger and my character look at me like, “Fr? This what we doin’?” AND THE KICKBACK?! Nga, I damn near fell off a roof shootin’ it once. Man said “single fire” — they ain’t say it came wit trauma. I air that hoe one time and gotta sit down after like I just ran a lap. I’d do more damage throwin’ the whole gun at somebody. Meanwhile PETER LONG out here laughin’ at me, talkin’ bout “damn, couldn’t even cop a Glock?” Bitch if you don’t shut yo 6'7 built-like-a-loading-screen ass up — he out here carryin’ RPGs like lunchboxes, while I’m tryna get a kill with a damn Flintstones rifle. Bro walk into a shootout lookin’ like a boss, I walk in soundin’ like I’m usin’ Nerf darts. Shii tragic. And don’t even get me started on RABID. Yo, that nga BEEN movin’ different lately — literally. Nga gained like 45 lbs since last update and now he be movin’ like his ankles on strike. Talkin’ bout “yo cover me” while he breathin’ hard from climbin’ one stair. All that hotdog eatin’ finally caught up to his dumbass. He be in the safe zone camped by the snack stand, dual-wieldin’ glizzies instead of guns. I had to revive him twice last night — once from gettin’ lit up, and once from chokin’ on a chili cheese dog mid-RP. Told him, “bro if you die from nitrates one more time I’m leavin’ yo ass.” Meanwhile I’m out here broke, hungry, got PTSD from the ATM, carryin’ a WWI museum piece as a weapon, stuck in a squad wit a tank-sized hotdog addict and Peter mf Long, who think he better than everybody ‘cause he ain’t touched poverty since the beta. Devs, I’m BEGGIN’ you — give me a refund or a patch. Hell, delete the MK-1 from the game and my memory. I don’t even want the receipt, I just want PEACE. This game got me RPin’ a man on the edge. One more misfire and I’m uninstallin’.

Holy cornball

Fucking retarded turks REGION LOCK OLYMPUS

forgot about that fat ass nigga rabid

Sweet can't wait

win ner

W

You can sell to Anomaly TDMHeyzues or another youtuber/streamer on twitter for like ~90% buff value. I would wait for an update for CS2 because skins are down like 20% as a whole rn.

i thought you quit retard

VIP on Olympus indicates that I was 14 at one point

lol pussyy

How do I access the ATM???

this has to be the least funny thing ive seen in a while

Me

BEAR DRAFT WALTER PAYTON SUPERBOWL BEAR DOWN

unmute it

Just do a box truck run and make a mil if you need money that bad

title

Please forgive me for not playing I must get max traders on tarkov

Yes sir

This is a great post

ez win

want to do another flip for it?