Try and make a general inquiry stating this in your ticket. I would ask for a whitelist to a VPN since it is such a hassle to join and stay on the server for you and your brother.
Go to support tab on the forums and for department select "General Inquiry" to submit the ticket. Hopefully this helps you. Good Luck.
If you didn't make an attempt to land or comply they can fire upon your heli. In regards to getting lethaled i'd say it was an iffy situation, but i'm sure the CPL didn't mean to and instantly offered compensation. If you see a problem here submit an IA report. If he comped you or offered some sort of compensation i'd say have some sympathy and don't report anything.